


No place left to hide

by Tayani



Series: Beautiful Ones [2]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Aftercare, Akechi Goro Is A Ball Of Issues But Akira Loves Him Anyway, Akechi Goro Lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blindfolds, Blindness, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, Gift Fic, M/M, Post-Canon, Restraints, Scars, Self-Esteem Issues, Sensory Deprivation, Shuake Week 2020, Soft Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:02:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27655196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tayani/pseuds/Tayani
Summary: Shuake Week Day 6: Sins / Partnership / Per aspera ad astraAs an attempt to overwrite some of Goro's worst memories, he and Akira decide on trying out something different in bed.Continuation of Beautiful Ones.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Beautiful Ones [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2022112
Comments: 14
Kudos: 170





	No place left to hide

**Author's Note:**

> Somnum drew a beautiful artwork for this story! You can see it [here!](https://twitter.com/noxsomni/status/1330642536747200514?s=21)

Usually, Goro found it soothing, to wake up in complete darkness.

Right after he woke up at the clinic, burnt, disfigured and in pain, those moments in the dark would bring him much-coveted relief. In the night, there were no doctors poking and prodding at him, no nurses pelleting him with useless questions and comments about his state. There’d be no need for him to look and see his skeletal hands laying on the bed and the ugly, pink stretches of scars covering his left side peaking from under the bandages.

Most of all, in the dark, he could open both of his eyes - and see exactly the same thing with both of them.

For just a moment, he could pretend he was, once again, whole.

And now…

The satin of the blindfold felt curiously cold to the touch. Goro tried opening his eyes, just to check, but the material was thick enough not to let through even a single ray of light. With his sight taken away completely, Goro’s other senses seemed to grow sharper. His ears were ringing with the silence, the touch of bedsheets against the bare skin of his back almost overwhelming in its intensity.

When a voice whispered in his ear, just inches away from him, Goro had to stop himself from jumping.

“Comfortable?”

Akira’s tone was low and husky - Joker’s voice. Somehow, rather than calm him, it made goosebumps creep over Goro’s forearms. In their wake, he felt Akira’s hands, his touch cooling and burning him all at once.

“You’re so beautiful, Goro,” Akira whispered into his other ear, the unexpected direction throwing Goro off again, making him shiver. He felt silk slide around his wrist like a snake and, the next moment, his right hand was being tied to the headboard, soon followed by his left.

“All open and bare for me,” Akira continued to talk to him from the darkness. Goro tugged experimentally at the silk restricting his arms; it held fast.

He couldn’t move, couldn’t see; and while his mouth remained unrestrained, he was being kept mute by Akira’s order, more effective than any gag.

Akira’s warmth and touch left his skin and Goro strained against his bonds again, trying to reach out to him. He met nothing but emptiness; there wasn’t even a sound of Akira sternly telling him to stay still. 

Nothing.

Nothing, but the dark and quiet, wrapping around him like a thick blanket.

Goro remembered, briefly, a similar situation, which happened only a few weeks ago. They tried something like this, a spontaneous little idea of fun. Even now, even though he was prepared for it,  _ asked  _ Akira for it, the shadow of the previous panic licked at his mind.

Years of traversing the Metaverse alone and then years spent with his body broken and refusing to move as he commanded it weighed heavily on Goro’s psyche. Even now, in a familiar setting and with his boyfriend there, being unable to move, his instincts screamed danger at him. He should be running away, he should be tugging himself free, trying to escape-

“Thoughts only on me, Goro,” Akira’s voice cut through his momentary panic, pulling him out and letting him breathe. All of a sudden, Akira’s lips and hands were on him, caressing his skin, overwhelming and calming all at once.

“Focus only on me,” Akira repeated, his voice filling the entirety of Goro’s universe.

Again, there was suddenly nothing touching him. Goro arched his back, wordlessly begging for the reassuring touch. In response, Akira’s burning hand cupped his cheek - the left side, the ugly, scarred,  _ awful _ -

“Stay still, my beautiful,” Akira whispered, leaning down to drag his lips over Goro’s scars. As if he could read his mind; as if together with his body, Goro had bared his heart open for him, as well.

“You can do that for me, can’t you?”

Slowly, Goro nodded. This time, after Akira left him, he stayed still and quiet, waiting to feel his touch again.

In the dark, in the silence around him, Goro felt the old thrills awaken once more. Every inch of his skin tingled, his body tense, ready to fight or flee. And yet, he stayed put, gave himself over completely, unconditionally to Akira’s whims.

The thought of Akira watching him now, waiting to see if Goro will be good for him, if he’d obey him, filled Goro’s body with a whole different kind of warmth. Even just months ago, the thought of being looked at would have made him feel sick. The slick, pink stretches of scar tissue covering the left side of his body, his pale, thin limbs, still lacking the strength they once had… Goro would look at himself in the mirror and feel disgusted, unfit to be seen near Akira, the beautiful, handsome,  _ perfect  _ Akira. He was broken and jagged, his body finally befitting the rotten soul inside it, and yet-

“So good for me, Goro,” Akira whispered and once again his lips were on him, hungrier now, more demanding. Goro’s breath hitched; he felt Akira’s tongue and teeth, teasing over his chest, expertly finding every single weak spot and using it to his advantage. Goro’s body tensed up for entirely different reasons. Akira’s teeth scraped over the sensitive expanse of his scars and Goro keened, the broken sound tearing out of his lips despite the direct order to keep silent.

Goro couldn’t see, but he knew Akira was looking at him, could imagine the way his gunmetal eyes burnt.

“Beautiful,” Akira repeated, a lie, Goro  _ knew  _ it was one, and yet-

“I love your scars, Goro,” he kept talking, kissing down Goro’s arm, over his sides and lower, nipping at the stretch of scar tissue on his hip. “They’re you. They’re  _ real _ . They’re every good decision you’ve ever made… They’re you coming back to me, they’re you deciding to keep on  _ living _ …”

Goro’s teeth clenched together. He couldn’t speak - wasn’t supposed to, but right now, he wouldn’t be able to make a sound even if he wanted to. He could feel his insides tightening. He was gasping for breath, tears gathering in his covered eyes.

These were lies. Goro knew perfectly well how he looked, what he  _ was _ .

Akira was always such a skilled liar, though. Even just a little bit more of this and he would make Goro believe…

Firm hands, gentle but unrelenting, slid down to his thighs. Akira guided his legs open and Goro went willingly, almost grateful for the more physical, vulgar turn to the situation. He could take much more physically than mentally and Akira knew it - he always knew, could always tell if Goro needed a break, a distraction.

“So good for me,” Akira repeated, breathing against the inside of Goro’s thigh, making him shiver. His lover’s hands guided his body open, pulled his legs up until he was laying even more vulnerable - and Goro still did nothing to resist, didn’t even think of protesting.

The thought was almost soothing. With anyone else, anywhere else, at any other time, Goro would feel panic, complete and utter dread of being so explicitly under someone else’s control. But this was Akira, and Goro would let Akira drive a knife right into his heart if it was what Akira had wanted. This was the only man Goro could let go for; the only one he loved.

The only one for him.

Akira’s lips slid down, over his perineum and down to his slick, already prepared entrance. Goro’s eyes snapped open under the blindfold; he let out a single, startled cry and arched his back off the bed, his head pushing into the pillow.

They’ve never- Akira had never-

Goro moaned again, losing control over his mouth just as he had already lost it over the rest of his body. Akira’s tongue on him,  _ in  _ him, Akira’s hands smoothing continuously over his skin, intermittently gentle and rough. Akira’s scent around him, his voice, his warmth, his heat; in the complete darkness, his arms bound, it was all Goro could feel.

Akira pulled away from him and Goro almost cried, hands straining against his bonds, desperate to feel, to  _ touch _ -

“I asked you to be still,” Akira’s voice, a growl uttered right into his ear. Suddenly, Goro felt Akira was hovering over him, his body inches from his own, his arms pushing his legs so far back they almost touched his head. Cornered and defenceless, completely at Akira’s mercy, Goro’s every cell screamed at him to run, to hide-

“Please-” he uttered, grasping at his silken restraints. He wanted to tell Akira to go on, to use him, be rough with him. He wanted to be broken, for the pain to replace the overwhelming, heart-tearing gentleness because it was too much, too raw…

Of course, Akira wasn’t going to oblige him. Even like this, even with Goro’s everything placed neatly in his hands, ready to crush, Akira kept him warm and comfortable.

Akira was always, always so frustratingly gentle...

“Goro…”

So careful, so caring, despite everything…

“You’re gorgeous.”

Even though Goro was such a foul, undeserving creature…

“Goro… You’re so…”

Even then… Akira still…

“I love you.”

Akira kissed him, slow and deep, like he wanted to steal Goro’s breath away and take it for himself. It was just as well. The gentleness, the sweet, sweet words and the feeling of Akira finally pushing inside him, linking them together - it was too much. Goro felt tears spill under his blindfold, felt his too-loud mind become completely overwhelmed, all the thoughts and fears turning into white noise.

There was nothing but Akira, taking him, branding him with love until all the masks and all the doubts melted away. He was left naked and vulnerable and terrifyingly open, and Akira came into him, clawed and scratched out a hole for himself and filled him,  _ completed  _ him.

To belong to another person like this - it was terrifying. But oh, how Goro yearned for the feeling of it.

“Goro…  _ Goro _ -”

Akira’s voice rang in his ears, so perfectly lovely, music made from broken calls of his name. Goro felt Akira’s hands grip his legs, push them even further down, the stretch of his muscles adding a pleasant burn to all the other sensations. And Goro laid there and took it, took it all, hungry for even more, insatiable.

“I love you… Goro… you feel so good… so good, so  _ perfect  _ for me, just for me,  _ mine _ -”

_ Yes, _ Goro wanted to answer, his body trembling like a leaf in Akira’s arms.  _ Yours, just yours. My body, my soul… not even mine anymore. All… All of it… Just for you- _

Akira’s lips found his again; his hands moved up to Goro’s own, untying his restraints. They joined together, clung to each other so tightly it was hard to say where one ended and the other began.

_ I love you _ , Goro wanted to scream, to sob as the tears only grew in number, streaming from under his blindfold.  _ No one… Ever… No one else but you _ .

“I know,” Akira moaned against his lips; and then everything, even his lover’s voice, melted away in a white, hot flame swallowing the two of them whole.

* * *

“Goro…”

A whisper; a brush of lips against his cheek. Goro let out a sound. He wasn’t entirely sure where he was or what had happened. His mind, overwhelmed by the sheer power of emotions washing over him, seemed to have switched on autopilot at some point.

It was still dark, but Goro felt safe. Akira was laying with him, on him, his warmth wrapped around him like a weighted blanket.

“Are you with me?”

“Mmm…” Goro mumbled, whining in quiet protest when Akira pushed himself up and sat on the bed, reaching out to cup his face.

“You were crying… are you alright?”

Akira’s voice was so comforting. Still somewhat out of it, Goro nodded, leaning into the touch. Somewhere above him, he heard Akira chuckle, and then felt a sweet little kiss being pressed to his forehead.

“I’m going to take the blindfold off now, alright?” Akira said, pressing a kiss over each of his eyes in turn. “Keep them closed for me for a bit. It’s pretty dark here, but I don’t want you to rush anything.”

“Mother-hen,” Goro grumbled, voice still hoarse and choked up. In response, Akira simply kissed him again. 

The cool material of the blindfold slid slowly over his face. Almost immediately, it was exchanged for Akira’s lips and careful hands, kissing him, murmuring praise. Goro knew he was trying his best with the aftercare, making sure at every point Goro was comfortable and cared for. He appreciated it, even if personally, he thought Akira always went overboard with it. Even if a bit excessive, it made him feel safe.

_ Even though he didn’t deserve it _ …

“Open your eyes for me? Just slowly, and blink a lot, alright?”

Goro’s lips pressed together. Akira must have noticed his hesitance, but he didn’t rush him. Goro felt his lover’s hands find his own, their fingers intertwining. He shifted on the bed and felt the pleasant soreness in his muscles, the wet feeling of cum trickling down his thigh; a feeling he took a  _ lot  _ of pleasure and satisfaction in, even if he wouldn’t be caught dead admitting it.

Akira pressed a kiss to his left cheek and Goro hated himself for flinching. 

“You know I’d never lie to you, Goro,” Akira whispered into his ear. “You’re perfect. Just the way you are. Warts and all,” he laughed as he said the last sentence, and a snort of startled laugh left Goro’s lungs as well.

“Excuse  _ me _ , I don’t have  _ warts _ ,” he said and, as Akira continued to giggle, finally opened his eyes.

Even now - even years after he lost the sight in one of them, Goro  _ still  _ hoped that somehow, just this once… he’ll open his left eye and be able to see again.

Like always - like every morning - he was disappointed. 

As if reading his mind,  _ again _ , Akira leaned in, pressing their foreheads together.

“Like I said… perfect.”

Goro smiled - a shy, awkward little thing. Akira let out a long breath and kissed him again.

“Let’s go take a bath, alright? I’ll carry you,” he said, and before Goro could protest, he was being hoisted up into a bridal carry, yelping and flailing to wrap his sore arms around Akira’s neck. His lover laughed and Goro huffed, pulling at his hair in retaliation.

“You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

“Nah,” Akira said, carrying him out of their shared bedroom and to the bathroom. Their little apartment wasn’t extravagant - both he and Akira didn’t want to spend too much money if they could help it - but the bathroom was spacious and comfortable, with a bathtub easily able to fit the two of them if need be. It was one of the main reasons they picked this particular apartment in the first place.

Smiling at the memory, Goro allowed himself to be seated on the edge of the bathtub, watching as Akira bustled around, preparing their bath. Goro reached down, dipping his fingertips in the pleasantly hot water, his hair falling like a curtain over his face.

“I…” he started and then had to stop and wonder what exactly it was he wanted to say. So many things; so many thoughts still circled in his mind, Goro wasn’t sure how to vocalize them. Beside him, Akira hummed, patiently waiting for him.

Like usual. Like always.

“Thank you,” Goro said, feeling stiff and awkward, the words laying strangely on his tongue. “For… for doing this with me. I still… it didn’t exactly… I still don’t really…  _ believe  _ it, the things you said… but, even so, I…”

Goro trailed off. His voice, so carefully steady at the start, was getting choked up again. He felt Akira walk closer and the next moment, he saw his lover kneel before him, looking up into his face.

“I know,” Akira said, reaching up to caress Goro’s disfigured cheek. “There’s no rush, love. You don’t need to believe me right away. We’ll work on it; I’ll tell you again and again. I’d never lie to you, Goro, so I don’t mind waiting for you to feel more comfortable with the fact that… I do  _ really  _ find you beautiful. Yes, even with your eye and your scars.”

Goro let out a laugh. All of a sudden, he felt weak, sliding from the edge of the bathtub; and there was Akira, ready to catch him, always there to break his fall.

“Years pass, people change… and you still mystify me, Akira,” Goro said, leaning his head against Akira’s chest. He felt a kiss, quick like a lightning, pressed against the top of his head.

“There’s nothing mysterious about it,” his lover shrugged. “I love you. That’s all - nothing more, nothing less.”

In Akira’s voice, Goro heard warm amusement and - yes - love. He closed his eyes. In the raw, vulnerable state he was still in, Goro knew he was prone to cry, and he’d rather not if he could at all help it. Akira picked him up again, carefully guiding him into the bathtub before sliding in with him.

“We’ll just need to work on you next,” Akira continued, kissing him once more. “So  _ you  _ are able to love yourself, too.”


End file.
